What does 11,250 calories look like?

When I was considering whether or not to sign up for the Tour de Force, a number of things were going through my head: 

• the ridiculously long distances I would have to cycle (stages 10-13 of the Tour de France will cover 694km in total); 
• climbing massive hills/mountains;
• going quite fast down the other side of the massive hills/mountains;
• how painful are saddle sores going to be? 
• am I actually capable of raising £1,200 for charity?
• who will look after my cats while I am away?

When I spoke to my girlfriend's parents, after signing up, her mum asked if I would cope with eating enough food. I smiled politely and nodded. I am capable of shovelling a surprising amount of food into my chops when I want to (my mum has always said that I have hollow legs - although this in itself would present different problems for me as I prepare for a cycling challenge).

I later read that over the four days of cycling I will burn 45,000 calories. This is an average of 11,250 calories each day.

WHAT.
 
THE ACTUAL.
 
FUDGE!!!!!

To put this into context, the NHS recommends around 2,500 calories per day for a man eating a healthy, balanced diet (although this depends on a number of factors - please don't rely on me for nutritional advice*). This means that I will burn around 4.5 days' worth of calories each day.

I need to work out a way of calorie-loading.

In the run up to the 2016 Rio Olympics, USA swimmer (and petrol station fan) Ryan Lochte tweeted a picture of what appeared to be a day's food, which reportedly contained 10,000 calories. Leaving aside the whiff of burning which emanates from the disgraced athlete's underwear, eating this much food would be quite a feat in itself - and still wouldn't cover me for a day's cycling!

I should probably start upping my food intake now.

Where did I leave that pie... ?

Shout outs:
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Thank you for reading.



* unless you wish to discuss the sheer joy of salt & vinegar crisps in a sandwich, in which case I have plenty of wisdom to offer